And then frustration.

Days 5-7 were pretty much the same. And by same, I mean a major fucking struggle every single second. I didn’t understand. After reaching such a high in my meditation practice the day before, how could I go back to such gross pain? It was like the moment never happened. Mentally, I felt strong. Sharp….

yoga noobie.

When I was in college, I did yoga for the first time. I arrived at the local studio early, not sure what to expect. The door had a sign asking people to use noble silence as a class was being taught on the other side of the beautifully carved door. I wasn’t sure what noble…

Am I meditating? Or half sleeping?

On day 4 – I observed the sensations as I slowly concentrated on each individual part of my body. I sweated and itched and fought through the morning, struggling to calm my mind, accept my suncaras as they arose and fully practice Vipassana. After lunch, the teacher checked in with each person, asking how well…

a game called let’s not succumb to heat exhaustion.

On day 3 – I observed the sensations forming on the smaller triangle around my nostrils and upper lip. Not unlike the first two days, I also observed the gross pains in my legs, and the pins and needles tingles vibrating through my feet as the numbness expanded beyond my ankles. Another thing I observed…

oh. my. buddha.

Author’s note: This is part 1 of a series. It is based on my experiences and observations of Vipassana and does not encompass every aspect of the practice. It is not religious. It is solely reflective of me and my mind. That being said, it contains foul language and is slightly offensive. And by buddha…

the long con.

i look like a sweet, innocent girl. i look naive and young. really young. in fact, since arriving almost a week ago, i’ve been told 5 times that i look no older than 20. to which i reply that i’ll be turning 27 this year only to see dropped jaws and wide eyes. (thank you…

got to jet.

as i waited to board the plane – the first of three in a 12-hour period – in the dingy, gray and dismal hall, I could see my breath as white as a ghost as I exhaled. I thought to myself, “the cold is almost behind you.” It wasn’t going to be long – 27…

a note to concerned friends

Telling people you’re quitting your job, packing up your life, living out of a backpack and moving across the world – always illicits a number of strong emotions and reactions. Mostly, you can see the fear slowly move into their eyes. Their words shout encouragement, but the fear lingers in the silence between pauses, between…

my goodbye weekend.

I was once told, “Try and surround yourself with positive, happy people. People who won’t bring you down and you’ve got half the battle won,” he said. I wasn’t prepared. This weekend was a blur. A blur of beautiful faces and souls, all coming together to say goodbye to this leg of the journey. It’s…

time to quit.

It was a Monday afternoon when I realized it had to happen right then. I had to quit my job an entire month earlier than I planned. At 2:45, the president of my company had just offered me a trip to Boston to attend a social media conference. He needed to know by the end…

the four-month agenda

the four-month agenda is fluid. it isn’t limited by booked hotel rooms or fixed flights, busses or trains. it doesn’t have an itinerary that can’t be changed or thrown out the window. it is free to evolve and morph and serve me as it should. a fluid agenda will allow me to wander and explore…

the year of 26.

In October, I turned 26. As a way to fully shed the layer of dark toxins circling around me and swirling inside my mind and soul – I decided to enroll in a two-day detoxing yoga conference. Hosted in a hotel a town 15 minutes away from me, people came from across the border from…